There's no limit

NEW JOURNAL

2005-11-05T23:01:31Z

NEW JOURNAL! USERNAME: VANDERKOOY

Brush your shoulders off

2005-11-05T22:46:54Z

Went to Jay Johnson's funeral today. It was really touching, honestly. Then went to Moe's afterwards with Doug and his fam, along with my mom and sister. Yeah, last night I got like freaking 4 phone calls, one after the other, after I had gone to bed. They were wierd phone calls too. Then at like 4 in the morning the cat woke me up, which I never have in my room. It must have sneaked in during the day. I went to let it out after it started annoying me and waking me up, and then the other cat ran out that I had no idea was inside my room either. Whatev! Jase is coming to pick me up right now. We might hang out with Sarah later. We'll see what goes down.

loserkornfreak @ 2005-11-04T23:46:00

2005-11-05T04:46:13Z

Today I woke up and went to the blood bank to give platlets, just out of the goodness ofmy heart. It takes like 2 hours, so I watched Anchorman. LOUD NOISES! They missed the vein the first time, so now my arm looks like I'm in Requiem for a Dream. It's all Bruised n whatnot. I got a good free lunch out of it though, Cheesburger with sauteed onions. Yeah, then I went to Jase's and almost fell asleep I was so tired. We decided to go see Waitining with Shannon, but they were gay and wouldn't let Shannon in without an ID. So we went to Jamba Juice, I got a banana berry. It was good. So tired, I'm out.

Love can be your best friend and your worst enemy

2005-10-31T17:15:09Z

Yeah, I still love her. but things are looking worse and worse. I've decided that all i can do is try my best, pray, and if shit doesn't work out, then it wasn't meant to be. I just don't understand how she can just leave me like that, for no reason except she wants to be independent. I treated her the best that I could and it seems she should be the one begging for me. Too bad things didn't work out that way.

Been chillen with Steve and Jase and stopped by Liz's once. It's been fun, but still...

please be gentle with my heart.

loserkornfreak @ 2005-10-09T21:38:00

2005-10-10T01:38:15Z

I'm supposed to be doing homework right now. Limp Bizkit is actually the shit man. This song really has to do with what I'm going through. Oh man, I need to go to horror nights, i hope i get a night off sometime, so I can go. whoop. My family is broke right now, I'm basically broke, like 5 bucks. Pay check friday supposedly.

"I just read your letter,

It says that you'll be gone for awhile.

Everything was getting better,

I guess I'm just a fool strung-out.

What to do?

Life is through.

Just wanna kill, myself for you.

I wonder, just how sympatic you'll be?

You've come to take me under,

And I've forgotten all about me.

What to do?

Life is through.

Just wanna kill, myself for you.

So tell me why?

You say goodbye.

And tell me why!??

YOUR FUCKING UP MY WHOLE LIFE!

Yeah,

Fucking up my whole life,

So I'm on my way,

I leave today,

If I get away,

It'll be okay.

It'll be okay.

I'm looking out a window,

Into a world that's taking you from me.

And I'm feeling so disgusted,

How pathetic can I possibly be ?

What to do?

Life is through.

Just wanna kill, myself for you.

So tell me why?

You say goodbye.

And tell me why!??

YOUR FUCKING UP MY WHOLE LIFE!

Yeah,

Fucking up my whole life.

So I'm on my way,

I leave today,

If I get away,

It'll be okay.

It'll be okay.

If their's a better place you can take me,

A better life you can give me.

Whatever place I can start all over.

Then I would, never need what you gave me.

Never need you to save me.

And never feel like this life is over.

IF THERE'S A BETTER PLACE YOU CAN TAKE ME,

A BETTER LIFE YOU CAN GIVE ME!

WHATEVER PLACE I CAN START ALL OVER!

THEN I WOULD, NEVER NEED WHAT YOU GAVE ME!

NEVER NEED YOU TO SAVE ME!

AND NEVER FEEL LIKE THIS LIFE IS OVER!

FEEL LIKE THIS LIFE IS OVER!

So I'm on my way,

I leave today,

If I get away,

It'll be okay.

It'll be okay."

rrright

2005-10-04T00:18:39Z

Got Linh at the airport today, she really didn't think I would show. I took her home, we talked, sigh. We'll see...

Quizno's

2005-10-03T02:45:50Z

Well today after church I went to starbucks and got an application and i figured I'd stop by quizno's again. I filled out an application and got hired on the spot, they told me I'd start at 4. So tonight from 4-9 I worked over at quizno's. It seemed slow so two guys left and it was just me and the manager, then it got busy and it didn't slow down until closing. It was some craziness, but in a way it was sort of thrilling you know? You have to do all these things as fast as possible. At one point there were like 10 people in line. Oh! and David came in, stoned, so great. I think he may have broken kosher, I think I might have put cheese on his sub. So yeah, and I get like 50% off when i'm working and as many drinks as i want. oh and friends get 10% off so, yeah, I work thursday through sunday this week at the quizno's in shadowood.

"Go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah, go...
You better believe it, confidence
Go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah, go...
Spit out all reason,
Yeah
I'm tired of holding up the weight
The weight of the motherfucking world
All I want is to just get right here, right now
We struggle and fight just to get in a grave that's overflowing
Clocks ticking on my fifteen minutes of fame, come on now 123 go
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
You better believe it, confidence
Go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
Spit out all reason
Yeah
I'm flushing the trust out of everyone
Stabbing in the back and thinking they can break me
Set my sight can't die till I'm done
Mind endurance
Never wanted anymore than what I deserve
Better bring it, I'm taking it all
Fuck an inch, 'cause I'm bringin' a mile
It's on now 123 go
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
You better believe it, confidence
Go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
Spit out all reason, yeah
This fire is growing, is burning deep inside of me, focused
Driven, certain, the way it's got to be
Fire, growing, burning, deep inside of me, focused, driven
Certain, the way it's got to be
Crooked, no trust, liars, conmen, drunk with, power, mentor
Taught me everything that I know...
So wrong
Wrong
Wrong
Wrong...
123, go...
So fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
You better believe it, confidence
Yeah
Go...
I'm fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go..
Spit out all reason
Go...
I'm fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
You better believe it, confidence
Yeah
Go...
I'm fucking determined
Yeah, yeah go...
Spit out all reason
Yeah"

loserkornfreak @ 2005-10-02T01:23:00

2005-10-02T05:47:55Z

tonight me and josh and his whole gang hung out and eventually found out there was a party in parkland. So we smoked a joint Josh found in his car, went there, and it was okay, but the entire time I just felt like shit.

my skin misses her soft loving touch. My blood is filled with the pieces she left behind. My hands miss her grip, and my soul craves to hold her close. My lips miss her warm breath and her gentle kiss. Just her name is enough to bring feeling of ecstasy and a tingle to my tongue. My spine is snapped from her blow.

f*** the subject

2005-09-30T23:25:03Z

Today I went to the mall with Sara and Linh.

I saw the coolest freakin hoodie. I was gunna go back and buy it, but apparently we are too poor. It was 40 bucks, which isn't too bad for a hoodie. Then I took Linh to the airport and then after i dropped her off i missed the exit for 595 which of course sends me into downtown ft. lauderdale and then i have to spend like an hour just to turn around and get back on 595 because of the freakin traffic lights everywhere.

"The moon will lead me back to earth again"

"Here's to the nights we felt alive
Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry
Here's to goodbye, tomorrow's gunna come too soon"

Matchbook Romance

2005-09-27T01:48:45Z

"My Eyes Burn"

My eyes burn from these tears

You'd think I'd learn over these years

Good things won't last forever

So what the hell am I suppose to do

You only wanted the things I couldn't give to you

And you had it all anyway

So take take everything and leave me scrambling

Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

So take take everything and leave me scrambling

Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

Tell me I'm wrong when I say

I can't expect you to spend forever with me

I live for that single moment

I take back everything I've said

You wore those words on your lips

As if they meant anything anyway

Sometimes I feel I could drop off the face of the earth

It seems I do more harm than good

And I don't know if it's worth me loosing sleep over this

So take take everything and leave me scrambling

Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

So take take everything and leave me scrambling

Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

Tell me I'm wrong when I say it

I can't expect you to spend forever with me

I live for that single moment

So take take everything and leave me scrambling

Reaching for something that wasn't there in the first place

ugh

2005-09-26T22:32:44Z

I feel like I'm in a nightmare, but I'm not even close to waking up.

"Found you there in the blink of an eye
I miss you
Turned away into a thousand dreams
You've found out what they mean

Lost you there in a moment of truth
I trust you
Gave away your one and only heart
A gift to tear apart

Stain me, save me
Take me to my home
Hold me, show me
Take me to my home

Weaker now, drawing fluid from me
You kill me
I'm not afraid of what you have just done
But of what you've just become"

does anyone read the subject?

2005-09-26T02:23:48Z

wow, how does everyone keep so up to date on their myspaces and livejournals? Well, this weekend I went out to my friend doug's house for a majority of the weekend, it was his 18th birthday. Went to a pub friday night and had a little shindig on saturday at his house. Today I went to work and fiddled around with some new software and it looks really promising. Then I took a "nap" which ended up being 4 hours long. I made farfalle with chicken in a garlic sauce for dinner for the family and Linh, it was good but it didn't measure up to cheesecake factory, nothing does. So yeah, now I have to help my sister with her math. If you want to see what I've been up to, check out my picture journal, I'm gunna try to keep at least that up to date. http://vanderkooy.textamerica.com

Fixed It

2005-09-22T20:37:31Z

Fixed my September 16th update.

Well yeah, about wanting to have fun this weekend...

2005-09-16T22:40:09Z

I'm looking forward to having a lot of fun this weekend, I better get out and go some places, or else. Maybe some downtown area visitations, party or so, chill with a bunch of people, you know, fun stuff. I wanna have a jam packed weekend, if anyone wants to chill, give me a call.

I wanna have some fun this weekend

2005-09-16T21:42:59Z

I don't know what they're talking about. I think there are more appropriate places for this sign.

Went to the mall afterschool last week, dang, we were hungry.

Sat down the other day and realized there was no paper, luckily my sister was in the house and on hand to bring me some toilet paper from my parents bathroom. How bad would that situation be if i was home alone.

Went to the beach and chilled on the playground last weekend, apparently a bunch of people got arrested there that night.

Coldplay Concert!

Stopped at Michaels for Liz to get some supplies the other day, damn, these dolls are scary!

My sister got eye surgery, dag yo, this is like 10 days after surgery

"Your face feels good!"

hahah

A cig is always good when you're chillen

Toutt really liked this picture

Taking pictures in the car on the way home afterschool. Wow, complicated sentence.

Watched Garden State again today, good movie, touching.

Gas

2005-09-01T02:23:55Z

Gas prices are going up and are predicted to rise, now I'm sure about getting a scooter. The gas is actually up 40% from last year, so if this keeps up... wow. This actually happened in Britain and prices are now around 7 dollars american there, that is why almost everything on the road there is either a scooter, or a compact. When I say compact, I mean a scooter with 4 wheels. I swear, in about 6 monthes, everyone is going to think I'm a genius for getting one. It probably won't be an unsafe option for very long because I'm predicting a lot more scooters to be on the road and way less cars.

Anyways, school is going great and I actually think I might get all A's this quarter, or at least mostly A's. Liz is becoming a good friend and a pretty good encouragement for me to do good this year. Me, Linh, and Liz went to Starbucks today to do homework, I got a Vanilla Creme, and it was amazing. It's just like a hot chocolate, but it's hot vanilla, and it's really creamy. Ugh, I love it. Anywho, this is a picture of the scooter I have picked out, hopefully I'll get it this weekend. But by the way my parents are, it probably won't be for a month, GRRR! Everyone wanted to make sure I didn't get a total euro style bike, like a vespa, so I finally decided not to. Not just because of their looks (I liked the look personally), but because they're 150% the price of other scooters. So without further delay, here it is:

Vespa

2005-08-25T21:33:27Z

Should I Get a Vespa Scooter or not? They're Stylin', they get about 80 miles to the gallon and that will be handy when gas prices shoot up 40%. Plus, they don't require insurance which is a biotch to pay. Even better, they're inexpensive. The thing is my mom keeps trying to convince me not to get one, that it's unsafe, and if it rains I'll get wet n shit. Plus it's hot, but the 2 stroke i'm probably getting goes 50mph so I'll have a nice breeze, and it's not liking I'm gunna be driving in the middle of the day anyways, I'll be in school. If I do drive during the day, It will only be a short distance so... I'm leaning towards a Vespa rather than a piece of shit car, because I only have maybe a thousand or two towards a vehicle. What do you guys think? I really need a means of transportation and this vespa is looking mighty good.

Art

2005-07-08T05:35:29Z

I need to scan more of my art, here is some of my older stuff

One of my Pictures "Untitled"

Pencil Sketch "All Eye on You"

Pencil Sketch "Constraint"

Pencil Sketch (for all the emo people out there) "The Last Breath"

Pencil Sketch "Half a Heartache"

That'll do for now, I'll try to not be lazy and get to scanning my others. tell me what you think.